all i want to wear are oversized sweaters and thigh highs thats it
I had a really small period and I was like “maybe I just miscarried a tiny fetus” and then I realized I haven’t had sex since Columbus landed in the Americas
I realize this sounds like I fucked Columbus. I want to clarify. Just so there’s no confusion, I did. I did fuck Columbus.
why put cookie dough in the oven when you can put it in your mouth
because I don’t want salmonella….
then don’t eat salmon….